Category Archives: At the Hideout

Stop and Smell the Roses – but be careful of the thorns! Beware of Habits that Kill.

(Note: Chapter 4 – Part I is coming up tomorrow. If you haven’t read the first three chapters, please find them in the sidebar.)

(Note2: This post is for the young reader.)

I am not posting Chapter 4 today, because I want to stop and smell the proverbial roses. You know that in my situation, I can’t smell the real ones – but of course, in the inspiring saying “Stop and Smell the Roses”, the roses are symbolic of stuff that’s nice. What it means is: Slow down! Don’t run so fast that all the beauty around you blurs away. 

And yet, when you stop to smell the roses, be aware that the most beautiful roses come with thorns. Sometimes the things that beckon at you and beseech you to step closer are pretty thorny when you get up close to them.

There’s stuff such as:

  • smoking
  • drinking alcohol
  • doing drugs
  • binging

All these are like those beautiful roses that pull us into a comfort-zone, making us feel high, fooling us into believing that we are just taking out time to stop and smell the roses by doing stuff that those other miserable people around us never do – we forget that all these roses come with poisonous thorns. This poison slowly but surely spreads into us,habituating and paralyzing us both physically and mentally.

So when you stop to smell the roses, stay at a safe distance. Find out if the roses that look so pretty, hide a slow-acting poison. If so, step back. You are better off NOT smelling the roses.

And remember that heroes don’t smoke, drink, binge, or do drugs.

I’ll let this pup do the talking.

Cartoons of Pups and Dogs - inspirational - Stop and Smell the roses - by Bobby Elhans

If you are wondering whether Cubby ever got out of that hole in the ground, return to read Chapter 4. It’s coming up tomorrow.


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From the Hideout: Why Publish a Book on a Blog?

I don’t know about all the other writers out there, but I am an obsessive storyteller who accidentally discovered writing as a medium to tell stories. A few years ago, I just happened to write a few stories, and discovered that writing stories could be a very interesting thing to do. As the written stories are immortal, I found writing to be a substantially more satisfying experience too. Since my serendipitous discovery, I’ve written short stories, adventure-serials, two novels, and two novellas. Have I published any? None. Why? Because of the perceived tedium involved in the publishing process.

I did check out Amazon, but I realized that unless you promote your stuff (or in other words, blow your own trumpet,) your book has near about zero chance of finding a buyer. I also read a lot of stories about reviews being bought (and sold) or swapped, and it all made me realize that I had neither the strength nor the resources to do any of it. I reflected on the situation and I concluded that I’d rather spend my time writing stories than trying to publish them.

I don’t know how much time I’ll be spending here in this iron-box that I euphemistically call “my hideout,” but until I am able to get out of this place, I’ll continue to publish the Adventures of the Heroes on my blog: Chapter-wise.

You’ve met Zoe, Cubby, and the Nameless Boy who lives in a Cave that isn’t a cave. Soon they will come together, with a couple of other equally disparate characters – and they’ll form a team, that will beat all other Super-Heroes of the world.

If you want to follow them on their adventures, follow this blog by clicking/tapping the Follow button in the right sidebar. The only condition for following is that you must think and believe that you are below 18. Those older-in-their-hearts could recommend it to the young in their families. I’d truly appreciate it.

I must now return to the story that I am writing for a competition. Cheer me on, please!


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Posted by on May 9, 2014 in At the Hideout, The Heroes


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From the Hideout: Every Dog Knows – To Hit the Mark, Aim a Little Above it!

Still here, but no grudges. I’ve been making cyber-friends who don’t talk to me but Like my posts, tweets, and retweets. It sort of makes me feel a little in touch with the thriving humanity outside this can of a place I am living in. As I said, no grudges.

I’ve never been a target-oriented hound of perfection. Never was, never will be. I think that the obsession to be perfect is the bane of the human-society. No other being is so driven by the need to hit the mark every time, all the time! Really. Let us talk about the writerly types. We obsess over punctuation and grammar all the time. I sometimes wonder why I should experience an acid reflux every time a comma decides to swap places with a period, or a “the” changes into “they”. It just squeezes all the fun out of writing, doesn’t it?

Here are a couple of target-oriented canines. Never before I had drawn a pup in the act of answering nature’s call – but the call to draw this cartoon came from within and strangely enough it helped me overcome my fear of drawing a peeing pup (PeeingPupPhobia?) !

If you would hit the mark, you must aim a little above it. – Henry W. Longfellow

Pup and Dog Cartoons - a pup learns to pee - if you would hit the target you have to aim a little higher!

Incidentally, this Follow thing’s great. It helps you discover like-minded people both-ways. Here are few of the blogs that I discovered through this route.

Check them out – depending upon where your interests lie.  I’ll share some more links with my future toony blogposts. On The Heroes front, Chapter 4 is ready to roll off the line, and will be presented either tomorrow or the day after. If you are new here, please find the links to the chapters of the book in the right sidebar.

Returning to the topic of Perfection and aiming right, what are your thoughts?
Who are you?

  1. A Perfection Hound,
  2. A Just-Missed-the-Target Pup,
  3. An I-gave-up-on-Perfection Wise Old Dog?!

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From the Hideout – Why we need Google and Dogs don’t?

(Note to the Readers: “Chapter 3: The Boy who lived in the Cave” will be posted tomorrow.)

For the last three days, I’ve been killing the keyboard over this story that I want to enter in a competition. Deep inside I know that I am not competition material. I’ve never won anything – not even a trip to the local fun-park. And yet I am sending an entry to this competition. Why? Because I am trapped in this underground hole of a room, and I have nothing better to do.

My situation is somewhat similar to Cubby’s except that I feel that his is a notch better than mine. I am sure Cubby would disagree.

On the virtual ground level of the world of Internet, I’ve discovered some cool blogs and learned to re-tweet and favorite, and frankly I am enjoying it.

Here are some of the blogs that I am following now. If you too have been canini-fied, you will find them as interesting as I do.

In the past few days, the story of our heroes has progressed a lot and I’ll be posting the fresh chapters more frequently now, so if are interested in reading pet-fiction and super-hero fantasies, push the Follow button and the chapters will be delivered right there in your mailbox.

By following this blog you confirm that you think you are below 18.

I am not going to repeat this elsewhere on the blog, and if you do follow this blog, I’ll assume that you do believe that you are still in your teens.

Let me leave you with this sketch that just appeared on my notebook, two days ago. I added a smart looking number and the blog address, so that it looked blog-worthy. I must share the credit for creation of this cartoon with my dog, whose continual sniffing led me to think that she was googling her treats up. For my incorrect conjecture, my left ear was promptly barked off. You moron, she said, humans need Google, because their noses don’t work.

smart and cute dog pup pet cartoon - why we need google.

Oh, Rumpydog has posted a cute poem about the powerful canine nose here. Do check it out.

That’s all, folks!

Tomorrow I shall return to tell you about the nameless boy and his discovery – and then we will return to Cubby and Zoe and see how they’ve been faring.



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From the Hideout – Finally, a formula that calculates the Cuteness of your Dog!

 “Chapter 2: Cubby” is coming up tomorrow.

Today, I intend to share this awesome formula with you. I’ve been working on this since last evening. If you’ve read this, you know that down here, I am forced to find innovative ways to keep myself occupied. One would expect my temporary subterranean abode to at least tempt the mice, but they too have kept away. I think that the canine smell on my clothes must have worked as some kind of vermin-repellent.

Without meandering any more, let me come to the crux of the canine-cuteness matter.

Here’s the formula.

Cc = (The sum of the values of the positive traits of your dog)/(The sum of the values of the negative traits of your dog)
If a trait exists in your dog, provide a value of 1. If it doesn’t, provide a value of 0.

Here’s the list of the five positive traits that make up the numerator.

  1. Innocence
  2. Playfulness
  3. Loyalty
  4. Love
  5. A round knobby nose

And the five negative traits that add up to form the denominator are as follows.

  1. Evil
  2. Revengefulness
  3. Hatred
  4. Duplicity
  5. A devilishly pointy, trifurcated tail

Sample Solution:
Here’s how I worked out the Cute-ness of my dog to be “infinity.”

How to calculate the cuteness of your dog - the secret formula - bobby elhans

If you have a canine family member, use this formula and see if you arrive at a different result. If your answer is different from mine, I recommend you check whether your dog is actually an illegal immigrant from the feline world and has been living with you under an assumed canine identity.



Posted by on April 26, 2014 in At the Hideout, Pet Humor


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Beep…beep…Hello…hello…Anyone There?

Testing to see if the WordPress Blogging Equipment works in my hideout.

This place appears to be underground and the reception definitely isn’t what you get at the surface.

I must stay out of sight, hidden in this crummy little cabin, until the mission ends. So I could be stuck here for a very long time. Don’t ask me where I am; I was brought here blindfolded, so I have no idea where exactly I might be.

All I can see before me is a desk with a computer (yes – the one I am using right now,) a bunk bed, a door that leads to the toilet (I think,) and walls that are made of rough unfinished stone. You got it right. Stone. An excuse of a cupboard stands against the wall that’s directly opposite to my bed. Right next to the cupboard is another door, the one through which I had entered. They had removed the blindfold outside the door, so I know that there’s a four square feet antechamber outside.

Frankly speaking, I have no idea why I am here – but I have a strong feeling that this may have something to do with them.


Yes. I’ll tell you everything that I know about them. Post by post, I’ll tell you their story. I’ll tell you how they became one of the most powerful avengers on the planet, and how they used their special skills to set things right.

I’ll tell you about their adventures, both small and big; and in my stories, I’ll leave certain clues. Some of you will find those clues – some will then use those clues to find me. I hope that you will – in case they forget about me, and leave me here to rot.


Posted by on April 25, 2014 in At the Hideout


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